People new to therapy often don’t know what to expect. They only know what they have heard about it. But there are many misconceptions surrounding family therapy, and I am going to debunk 3 of the biggest ones now.
1. Family Therapy Takes a Long Time Before You Get Results
Many people’s perception of therapy is of someone laying on a therapist’s couch for years, attempting to work out their numerous problems. So, when parents hear the phrase “family therapy,” they assume it is another form of ‘infinite therapy.’ But not all therapy takes a long before offering positive results.
In fact, from its very beginnings, family therapy has always been considered “brief therapy.” The goal of family therapists is to quickly resolve conflicts within a family, offering skills and tools to family members so they may move on to live healthier, happier lives.
2. Family Therapy is All About Blaming Parents for Children’s Problems
Perhaps the biggest misunderstanding about family therapy is assuming each session will focus on blaming them for their children’s problems.
This desire to stay away from blame is understandable. After all, parents of children who are having problems already feel terrible and guilty over their child’s struggles, they certainly don’t want the finger pointed at them or labeled dysfunctional.
But the goal of family therapists is not to place blame, but rather to ensure each individual is heard. While it may be necessary to point out areas where parents could adapt and grow, a therapist is ultimately there to work collaboratively with parents to bring about positive change.
3. The Whole Family Must be There at Every Session
Talk about a scheduling problem! The thought of having to get every single member of the family in the same room at the same time each week is a nightmare to most parents, who find it hard enough to get everyone to sit down together at the dinner table.
While some therapists prefer everyone be there, few assume you can make this happen. Sometimes parents and a child or children will be in the session together, and sometimes it may be just the parents, or only one of the parents. A good therapist understands the complexities of family life and will be flexible in working with everyone’s schedules.
Family therapy is quite different from individual talk therapy, and much of what you may have heard about it is simply not true. Family therapy is can quickly bring about positive changes and allow family members to reconnect and heal dynamics.
If you or a loved one is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.
My husband and I have been recently trying to see if we should get family therapy for our son due to him being very quiet and not wanting to communicate with us. I like what you said about a common misconception is that the whole family has to be there at every session, this really helps us to know. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for your feedback, Gina. I’m glad if my post was of help. Don’t hesitate to contact me if you have any questions or concerns.
All my best,
Christy G Buckner, MS
Thanks for the interesting read about the myths about family therapy! It’s great that you mentioned, under “Family Therapy is All About Blaming Parents for Children’s Problems”, that family counseling doesn’t necessarily mean that the parents will be blamed for their children’s problems. The true goal is that for the therapist to help ensure that each individual is heard. Therapy is there to bring positive changes to the family. I’m quite interested to see if we can get into a family therapy. I would just like to learn what my family thinks and if the therapy will help us be better than ever.
Thanks for dispelling some common beliefs about family therapy. I had always thought that family therapy took years to work, but I really liked your information that family therapy actually should not take long but should seek to resolve conflicts quickly. I’m really glad to hear that, and knowing it’s meant to work quickly makes me more inclined to use family therapy or recommend it to others.