Brene Brown, PhD, LCSW is known for her poignant, funny, straight-shooting talks and books on shame, vulnerability and authenticity. Brown deduced years ago that when we talk about our shame, it loses power over us. Letting our gaurd down and sharing our story with someone, is an act of courage. Some of us have loved ones we can trust with our shameful secrets and painful memories. If you do, be grateful, the ability to share your whole self with another is a beautiful thing…and the basis of a deep genuine bond.
I am grateful to have loving and supportive friends and family. But frankly, there were some events/memories over the years that I only felt safe sharing with my therapist. Revealing hidden parts of myself definitely took courage. When drug my shameful memories out into the light, they dimished and I was able to truly overcome them. Knowing that my therapist accepted and supported me at my most vulnerable, was not only a relief, but also powerfully healing.
My friends and family might have listened and supported me without judgement too…but I may never have gotten up the courage to talk to them. Maybe there were conflicts of interest, or was no appropriate time? But I knew when I hired a therapist, I could talk to them confidentially. They would be objective and practiced at enduring people’s painful stories. The safe boundaries of the counseling relationship, made it easier for me to open up and heal.
In fact, I have sought professional counseling briefly in nearly every decade of my life (ages 18, 26, 34, 43). My therapists were all skilled in their unique approach, but I believe the real healing occured just because I let another person see the whole, real, authentic me…and I survived without being rejected! They all listened without judgement; helped me see things from a new perspective; comforted me and offered encouragement. For me therapy was life-changing. Not that my therapists changed my life, but that in allowing myself to be vulnerable, I changed my own.
A good therapist simply creates a safe place for you to be vulnerable. I have created just such a space and I am here to listen without judgement. If you are ready to put shame and pain behind you, schedule an appointment today.